The Good Girl Theory & How I Failed Ultimately

By Staff Writer

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Our Unabashed Emotions team offers no-fuss advice on romance and relationships, perfect for the young and in love. We cut through the confusion with tips and stories in a way that's easy to grasp, like a conversation with a good friend.

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the-good-girl-theory

People who know me label me as a good girl, a sweet girl. Often, it just evokes a smile and I happen to adjust that invisible crown upon me. Since the time I remember, the good, sweet girl in me often found herself following the well set norms, failing which she would lose the crown and she dare not!

A good girl often means

  • Smiling at everyone’s poor jokes
  • Not mincing words and curse words (F**k, No!)
  • Taking the loose talks in ‘good spirit’ but not ‘seriously.’
  • Being an unquestioning follower
  • Exceptional grades, rank holder
  • No skin show
  • Falling in Love? Boyfriend? Hawww!
  • Doing everything right

I was all of these until I realized how I began stifling my own voice in the wasteful attempt of being a people pleaser. I strove for perfection, I strove for success and that only led me to failures. And then I realized that I could either be perfect or I could be happy. And considering the image that I had built, deviating even a little from the road I had chosen could award me with enormous back-lashing, judgemental eyes, deep counselling and what not.

But then, I decided to re-plan my life and give myself a break for good from my forever routine. Turning into a bad girl was not an idea and living in two identities couldn’t have been an option. So here’s all that I did which although did harm the tag but gave me a fresh lease of life.

  • I stopped towing the line and laid my own path, a journey I knew I would never question myself about.
  • I stopped relinquishing my goals to belong to a place I could never have been a good part of.
  • I stopped feeling flattered by honeyed words and blushing with Thank You’s only later to be perceived as silent and vulnerable.
  • My strings of failed relationships were nothing I was ever ashamed of.
  • Self love is the best form of love. I began to steal (read snatch!) time to please my hungry soul with whatever it demanded. Books? Good Food? Rest? Have it all.
  • If I don’t find it right, let’s not settle for it.
  • Relationship advice I gave myself: Adjusting to a situation is a good trait, compromising ain’t.
  • Being polite means letting go of all the rights that I deserve and are mine, I now choose to even mention it the least.
  • Life’s not all vanilla. A little shift from my mundane routine made my life so less frustrating.

free-woman

Well, the path was rough…tough but surely worth it! 🙂

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