Compulsive Cheating Disorder: Signs, Treatments & How to Deal

What Is Compulsive Cheating Disorder?

Compulsive Cheating Disorder refers to a pattern of behavior where individuals consistently engage in infidelity despite negative consequences. These individuals may exhibit traits associated with serial cheaters, raising questions about the possibility of change. 

While the phrase ‘once a cheater, always a cheater’ suggests a pessimistic view, it’s essential to recognize that change is possible. 

Understanding and addressing the root causes, seeking therapy, and fostering open communication are crucial steps towards breaking the cycle of compulsive cheating and promoting personal growth and healthier relationships.

9 Signs of Compulsive Cheating

Here are 9 signs that your partner may be engaging in compulsive cheating:

1. They are secretive

Compulsive cheaters often engage in secretive behaviour, hiding messages, calls, or activities to maintain their double life.

For example, your partner is guarding their phone, regularly deletes messages or abruptly end calls when you enter the room.

2. They constantly deceive you

A consistent pattern of lying, creating a web of deceit, is a hallmark of compulsive cheating disorder.

For example, your partner may lie about late nights at work or weekend plans to create a facade to cover up their infidelity.

3. They act impulsively

Compulsive cheaters may act impulsively, succumbing to immediate desires without considering consequences.

For example, your partner might engage in a spontaneous affair without considering the emotional impact on you.

4. They are unable to make commitment

Individuals with serial cheating traits struggle to remain faithful, exhibiting a pattern of infidelity across multiple relationships.

For example, your partner repeatedly betrays you and breaks the fidelity in your relationship.

5. They lack remorse

Compulsive cheaters may display a lack of genuine remorse for their actions, repeating the behavior without a sense of guilt.

For example, your partner offers shallow apologies without true remorse.

6. They try to justify their behaviour 

Justifying or rationalizing their actions is common among those with a cheating disorder, often blaming external factors rather than taking responsibility.

For example, when confronted, your partner might rationalize their actions by blaming relationship dissatisfaction or external factors rather than taking personal responsibility.

7. Their cheating escalates

Compulsive cheaters may escalate their cheating, with each episode becoming more intense or involving multiple partners.

For example, minor flirtations could escalate to more serious affairs or involvement with multiple partners simultaneously

8. They have a history of cheating

A consistent history of infidelity, irrespective of changing relationships, is indicative of a serial cheating personality disorder.

For example, your partner may have a documented history of infidelity spanning various relationships.

9. They are reluctant to change

While the question “will a cheater always cheat” is complex, a compulsive cheater’s reluctance to acknowledge and address their behavior hinders the possibility of meaningful change. 

For example, Despite recognizing the destructive nature of their behavior, your partner might resist therapy or counseling.

Watch this video to know how to confront your cheating partner.

5 Ways to treat Compulsive Cheating

Do not lose hope if you catch your partner cheating compulsively. Here are 5 ways to treat compulsive cheating: 

1. Therapy and Counseling

Engage in individual and couples therapy to explore the underlying issues contributing to compulsive cheating. Therapists can help identify triggers, address emotional needs, and develop healthier coping mechanisms.

2. Open Communication

Establish honest and open communication with your partner. Discuss feelings, concerns, and expectations. Effective communication can foster understanding and create a supportive environment for addressing the root causes of compulsive cheating.

3. Commitment to Change

Acknowledge the problem and commit to making positive changes. This may involve setting boundaries, practicing self-reflection, and actively working on personal growth to break the cycle of infidelity.

4. Seek Professional Help

Consult with mental health professionals, such as psychologists or psychiatrists, who specialize in treating compulsive behaviors. Medication may be recommended in some cases to address underlying issues like impulse control or anxiety.

5. Couples Therapy

Participate in couples therapy to rebuild trust and strengthen the relationship. A therapist can guide both partners in understanding each other’s perspectives, fostering empathy, and establishing a foundation for a healthier, more faithful connection.

7 Ways to Deal With a Compulsive Cheater

Dealing with a compulsive cheater in your life can be emotionally taxing. Here are 7 helpful suggestions:

1. Establish Boundaries

Clearly communicate your expectations and set firm boundaries to protect yourself emotionally.

How to: Communicate your expectations clearly. Explain what behaviors are unacceptable and the consequences for crossing those boundaries. Be firm and consistent in upholding these limits.

2. Seek Professional Help

Encourage the compulsive cheater to attend therapy, individually or as a couple, to address underlying issues such as Compulsive Cheating Disorder.

How to: Research therapists or counselors experienced in relationship issues and Compulsive Cheating Disorder. Discuss the idea of seeking help together. 

3. Evaluate Trustworthiness

Assess if the cheater demonstrates genuine remorse and willingness to change, considering the question, “Will a cheater always cheat?” Honest self-reflection is crucial.

How to: Engage in open conversations about trust. Ask the cheater to reflect on their actions and express genuine remorse.

4. Understand Serial Cheater Traits

Recognize patterns associated with serial cheating personality disorders and address these behaviors through therapy and counseling.

How to: Educate yourself on the traits associated with serial cheating personality disorders. Use this knowledge to address specific behaviors during therapy sessions and encourage personal growth.

5. Communication is Key

Foster open and honest communication to understand the root causes of compulsive cheating and work towards resolution.

How to: Engage in open dialogue by actively listening and expressing your feelings. Create a safe space where both of you can discuss your concerns without judgment

6. Reevaluate the Relationship

Consider whether the relationship is healthy and sustainable, weighing the impact of repeated cheating on your well-being.

How to: Reflect on the impact of repeated cheating on your emotional well-being. Assess whether the relationship is worth continuing.

7. Encourage Personal Growth

Determine if the compulsive cheater is actively working on personal development and change. Can compulsive liars change? With genuine effort and commitment, change is possible, but it requires consistent self-improvement.

How to: Discuss the importance of personal development and change. Explore how the cheater can actively engage in self-improvement.

FAQ’s

Is Compulsive Cheating Disorder Real?

Compulsive Cheating Disorder is not officially recognized as a standalone mental health disorder in established diagnostic manuals, raising debates about its legitimacy within the psychiatric community.

Can Compulsive Cheating Disorder be cured completely?

Complete cure for Compulsive Cheating Disorder is uncertain. Therapy and support can help manage impulses, but ongoing efforts are often necessary.

Is CCD solely about the desire for physical intimacy?

CCD is not solely about physical intimacy; it may involve emotional and psychological factors, reflecting deeper issues within the individual.

Can a relationship survive after a partner has been diagnosed with CCD?

A relationship can potentially survive after a partner is diagnosed with CCD, but it requires commitment to therapy, open communication, and rebuilding trust. Success depends on both partners’ willingness to address underlying issues.

Is cheating a mental disorder?

Cheating itself is not classified as a mental disorder, but it can be a symptom of underlying issues such as impulse control, emotional distress, or relationship problems. Seeking professional help can address the root causes.