People who know me label me as a good girl, a sweet girl. Often, it just evokes a smile and I happen to adjust that invisible crown upon me. Since the time I remember, the good, sweet girl in me often found herself following the well set norms, failing which she would lose the crown and she dare not!
A good girl often means
- Smiling at everyone’s poor jokes
- Not mincing words and curse words (F**k, No!)
- Taking the loose talks in ‘good spirit’ but not ‘seriously.’
- Being an unquestioning follower
- Exceptional grades, rank holder
- No skin show
- Falling in Love? Boyfriend? Hawww!
- Doing everything right
I was all of these until I realized how I began stifling my own voice in the wasteful attempt of being a people pleaser. I strove for perfection, I strove for success and that only led me to failures. And then I realized that I could either be perfect or I could be happy. And considering the image that I had built, deviating even a little from the road I had chosen could award me with enormous back-lashing, judgemental eyes, deep counselling and what not.
But then, I decided to re-plan my life and give myself a break for good from my forever routine. Turning into a bad girl was not an idea and living in two identities couldn’t have been an option. So here’s all that I did which although did harm the tag but gave me a fresh lease of life.
- I stopped towing the line and laid my own path, a journey I knew I would never question myself about.
- I stopped relinquishing my goals to belong to a place I could never have been a good part of.
- I stopped feeling flattered by honeyed words and blushing with Thank You’s only later to be perceived as silent and vulnerable.
- My strings of failed relationships were nothing I was ever ashamed of.
- Self love is the best form of love. I began to steal (read snatch!) time to please my hungry soul with whatever it demanded. Books? Good Food? Rest? Have it all.
- If I don’t find it right, let’s not settle for it.
- Relationship advice I gave myself: Adjusting to a situation is a good trait, compromising ain’t.
- Being polite means letting go of all the rights that I deserve and are mine, I now choose to even mention it the least.
- Life’s not all vanilla. A little shift from my mundane routine made my life so less frustrating.
Well, the path was rough…tough but surely worth it! 🙂