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Sometimes we feel really close to a friend, so close that it might feel like a crush, but without wanting to be romantic. This is called a platonic crush. Have you ever felt this way? It can be confusing, but don’t worry, you’re not alone.
In this article, we’ll explain what a platonic crush is, show you how to tell if you might have one, and give you tips on what to do about it. We’ll help you understand these special feelings and how they can fit into your friendships. Whether you’re just curious or think you might be going through this, we’ve got the answers to help you figure it all out.
A platonic crush, often referred to as a “squish,” is a strong feeling of attraction towards someone that isn’t romantic in nature. This type of crush can involve wanting to be around someone frequently, enjoying their company, and feeling a deep emotional connection, but without any desire for a romantic or sexual relationship. It’s more about valuing their companionship and admiring them as a person.
| Aspect | Platonic Crush | Romantic Crush |
| Nature of Attraction | Emotional and intellectual connection without sexual or romantic desire. | Includes emotional, romantic, and often sexual attraction. |
| Intentions | Desire for friendship, enjoying companionship and shared interests. | Desire for a romantic relationship, including dating, physical intimacy, and partnership. |
| Physical Intimacy | Little to no interest in physical intimacy beyond friendly, non-romantic gestures. | Interest in physical closeness, ranging from holding hands and kissing to more intimate physical contact. |
| Jealousy | Generally minimal; more about valuing the friend’s time rather than exclusivity. | Often includes feelings of jealousy regarding the romantic partner’s attention and exclusivity. |
| Future Plans | Envisions shared experiences as friends without living arrangements or marriage. | Often includes plans for cohabitation, marriage, or long-term exclusive commitment. |
| Emotional Dependency | Focus on mutual support and shared experiences without dependency. | Can involve deeper emotional dependencies and expectations for support and commitment. |
Here are the pros and cons of having a Platonic crush:
5 Pros:
Deep Emotional Connections: Platonic crushes can enhance your emotional life by deepening the bonds you share with others, which can be very fulfilling.
No Pressure of Romantic Commitment: Without the pressures and expectations that often come with romantic relationships, you can enjoy a more relaxed and stress-free interaction.
Freedom to Be Yourself: Platonic relationships often provide a space to be yourself without the fear of judgment, which can improve your self-esteem and confidence.
Learning Opportunities: These relationships can expose you to different perspectives and encourage personal growth and understanding.
Supportive Bonds: Platonic crushes can form the basis of strong, supportive friendships, which are crucial for emotional health.
5 Cons:
Misunderstandings: Sometimes, signals can get crossed, and one person may develop romantic feelings, leading to complications and discomfort.
Neglected Boundaries: The intensity of a platonic crush can sometimes lead to neglected boundaries, which might cause issues if not properly managed.
Jealousy: Issues can arise if a partner or another friend feels threatened by the closeness of the relationship.
Emotional Dependency: There’s a risk of becoming emotionally dependent on the person, which can be problematic if the feelings aren’t mutually understood.
Confusion: Figuring out your feelings and how to act on them without crossing lines can be confusing and emotionally taxing.
To know more about it,watch this video:
Acknowledge Your Feelings: Recognize and accept your feelings as valid. Understanding what you feel is the first step in dealing with it appropriately.
Set Boundaries: Clearly define your boundaries, and make sure to communicate them to avoid any misunderstandings or discomfort.
Keep Communication Open: Discuss your feelings if you feel it’s safe and appropriate. Honesty can prevent potential complications.
Focus on Building a Friendship: Channel your energy into building a strong, supportive friendship rather than dwelling on the intensity of your emotions.
Manage Expectations: Be clear about what you expect from this relationship and be aware of the emotional dynamics involved.
Seek External Support: Talk to other friends or a counselor if you find yourself struggling to handle the situation.
Here are the questions which are frequently asked:
Can you be attracted to someone platonically?
Yes, it’s entirely possible to feel attracted to someone in a platonic way. This type of attraction focuses on appreciating a person’s personality, values, and companionship without any romantic or sexual desire.
How to know if it’s platonic or romantic?
Distinguishing between platonic and romantic feelings can be challenging but consider factors such as your desire for physical intimacy, your feelings of jealousy, and your intentions for the relationship. If you’re unsure, reflecting on your emotions and discussing them with trusted friends or a therapist can provide clarity.
Is it normal to have a platonic crush?
Yes, having a platonic crush is entirely normal and common. It’s natural to feel drawn to someone for their personality, intelligence, or shared interests without necessarily desiring a romantic relationship with them.
What does platonic attraction feel like?
Platonic attraction often feels warm, comfortable, and emotionally fulfilling. You may enjoy spending time with the person, engaging in deep conversations, and sharing experiences together. While you appreciate their company and value their friendship, there’s no underlying desire for romance or physical intimacy.
As we wrap up our discussion on platonic crushes, let’s reflect on a famous quote by Maya Angelou: “Love knows no boundaries. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” Remember, love takes many forms, and platonic crushes are a natural part of human connections.
Whether you’re experiencing one or just learning about them, know that you’re not alone. By understanding the signs, weighing the good and bad, and taking steps to manage them, we can all navigate these feelings with understanding. So, embrace the journey, value your relationships, and remember that love, in all its forms, is a beautiful thing to cherish.
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