Online dating can be very helpful, and for some people, it can even lead to the discovery of a lifelong companion. On the other hand, some con artists may feel pressured by the anonymity of the Internet to locate victims through online dating profiles.
These con artists will entice their victims with tales of romance and fairy tale love, only to take advantage of them and steal their money. It’s crucial to understand how to avoid falling victim to romance scams if you use online dating apps or websites. Failure to do so could leave you with thousands of dollars in debt and a broken heart.
How can you tell if someone is a romance scanner?
Here’s how to identify potential red flags and protect yourself:
Early Signs of Trouble: Unrealistic Speed and Intensity
-
- Signs: They shower you with compliments and profess undying love within a short period. They pressure you for emotional intimacy, creating a sense of urgency and a strong emotional bond before you even know them well.
Action step: Don’t be swept off your feet. A genuine connection takes time to develop. Maintain boundaries and avoid sharing personal information too quickly.
Extraordinary Flattery and Grand Gestures
-
- Signs: They seem perfect, showering you with excessive compliments and promises of a future together. You might even receive extravagant gifts you never requested.
Action step: Be realistic. True relationships are built on mutual respect and understanding, not just flattery. Don’t be swayed by gifts. Legitimate partners wouldn’t pressure you financially.
Secrecy and Evasion About Themselves
-
- Signs:They keep their personal lives shrouded in mystery. They’re vague about their jobs, families, or backgrounds. When you try to delve deeper, they become evasive or change the subject.
Action step: Trust your gut. Open communication is key. If they seem unwilling to share details, it’s a red flag. Ask clarifying questions and be mindful of inconsistencies.
Financial Woes and Sob Stories
-
- Signs: The conversation suddenly revolves around money. They fabricate sob stories about emergencies, medical bills, or travel costs, pressuring you for financial assistance.
Action step: Never send money to someone you haven’t met in person. Legitimate partners wouldn’t make financial requests online. Report suspicious requests to the dating platform.
Resistance to Video Chatting or Meeting Up
-
- Signs: They consistently make excuses to avoid video calls or in-person meetings. These might include bad internet connections, dangerous work locations, or urgent travel plans that prevent them from ever being available.
Action step: A genuine relationship thrives on face-to-face interaction. Insist on video chat eventually. Be wary of excuses and inconsistencies.
Shifting Personalities and Inconsistent Stories
-
- Signs: Pay close attention to inconsistencies in their stories or sudden changes in personality. They might forget details or their online persona might not match how they communicate through text.
Action step: Notice inconsistencies and ask clarifying questions. A genuine partner will be happy to address any discrepancies. Don’t ignore red flags if their stories don’t add up.
Isolation Tactics: Pressuring You Off Dating Platforms
-
- Signs: They try to isolate you from your support system. They pressure you to move your communication off the dating platform or app and onto private messaging services they control.
Action step: NStay on the dating platform where there are safety features in place. A genuine partner wouldn’t try to isolate you from friends and family. Report attempts to isolate you to the dating platform.
How do you know if someone is scanning you?
You might not be able to spot a scam when you’ve fallen for someone you met online. To identify a romance scammer, watch out for these telltale signs that the person isn’t being sincere:
- They are so eager to get you attached that they jump into a relationship far faster than they should.
- Despite the fact that you have never met, they show you a lot of love and care.
- Their profile appears implausible. For example, they appear to be a “dream partner” with a glamorous job that pays well and pictures that look like they belong in a fashion magazine.
- They say they would like to meet in person, but they never really do.
- Early in the relationship, they express their desire to get married.
- You schedule a meeting with this person, but they always find an excuse at the last minute to avoid seeing you.
- They request financial data, including the numbers of your bank accounts.
- They make up long, convoluted tales to justify their need for payment. For example, they might say they will suffer a terrible accident at work or that they are the victim of a horrible crime.
10 Ways to outsmart a romance scammer
Understanding the strategies used by romance scammers as well as the warning indicators listed above will help you figure out how to stop them. Here are ten strategies to help you avoid falling for a romance scammer’s tricks.
1. Maintain a Healthy Dose of Skepticism
- What it Means: Don’t let flattery cloud your judgment. Be cautious of anyone who seems too perfect or moves the relationship too quickly.
- Tips:
- Manage Expectations: Genuine connections take time to develop. Be wary of someone professing undying love within a short period.
- Question Grand Gestures: Expensive gifts early on can be a ploy to gain your trust and exploit you financially.
2. Reverse Image Search Their Photos
- What it Means: Technology can be your friend. Use a reverse image search tool to see if their profile picture appears elsewhere online under a different name or story.
- Tips:
- Use Online Tools: There are several free reverse image search tools available online.
- Look for Inconsistencies: If the picture appears with a different name or story, it’s a red flag.
To know more about it, watch this video:
10 Common Things Romance Scammers Say.
3. Embrace Video Chatting
- What it Means: In a genuine relationship, building trust involves face-to-face interaction. Video chat allows you to verify their identity and see their body language.
- Tips:
- Suggest Video Chat Early On: Don’t wait too long to initiate a video call.
- Look for Excuses: Be wary of repeated excuses for avoiding video chat.
4. Ask Open-Ended Questions and Listen Closely
- What it Means: Genuine connections are built on communication and shared information. Pay attention to inconsistencies in their stories and how they answer your questions.
- Tips:
- Go Beyond Superficial Chats: Ask questions about their hobbies, interests, and life experiences.
- Notice Inconsistencies: Pay attention to inconsistencies in their stories or sudden changes in personality.
5. Do Online Research
- What it Means: The power of the internet goes beyond romance apps. Search for their name, phone number, or email address online to see if there are any negative reviews or scam reports associated with them.
- Tips:
- Search Social Media: Look for them on social media platforms to see if their online persona matches their story.
- Be Wary of Stock Photos: If you find their picture associated with multiple profiles or stock photo websites, it’s a red flag.
6. Don’t Share Personal or Financial Information
- What it Means: Keep your personal information and finances private until you know and trust the person. Romance scammers often exploit this information for identity theft or financial gain.
- Tips:
- Avoid Sharing Sensitive Data: Don’t share your Social Security number, bank account details, or home address online.
- Report Requests for Money: Never send money to someone you haven’t met in person. Report any financial requests to the dating platform.
7. Beware of Emotional Manipulation
- What it Means: Romance scammers often use sob stories or guilt trips to manipulate your emotions and gain your trust. Be wary of anyone who pressures you for money or emotional intimacy too quickly.
- Tips:
- Trust Your Gut: If something feels off, it probably is. Don’t be afraid to end communication with someone who makes you feel uncomfortable.
- Maintain Boundaries: Set boundaries and communicate your needs clearly. Don’t be pressured into revealing personal information or moving the relationship too fast.
8. Keep Your Support System Involved
- What it Means: Isolation is a tactic scammers use to manipulate their victims. Talk to trusted friends and family members about your online relationships and share any red flags you encounter.
- Tips:
- Seek Second Opinions: Get their perspective on your online interactions and potential red flags.
- Maintain Healthy Boundaries: Don’t let your online relationship consume your life or isolate you from your loved ones.
9. Report Suspicious Activity to the Dating Platform
- What it Means: Dating platforms have measures in place to protect users. If you suspect someone is a scammer, report them to the platform immediately.
- Tips:
- Gather Evidence: Keep screenshots of conversations, requests for money, or other suspicious behavior.
- Report Clearly: Clearly explain why you believe the person is a scammer and provide any evidence you have gathered.
10. Trust Your Gut Instinct
- What it Means: Often, our intuition picks up on subtle cues we might miss consciously. If something feels wrong, don’t ignore it.
- Tips:
- Pay Attention to Red Flags: Be mindful of the warning signs mentioned earlier.
- Don’t Be Pressured: Don’t feel obligated to continue a relationship that makes you feel uncomfortable or unsafe.
Remember, protecting yourself from romance scams is about being cautious and proactive. By following these tips and trusting your gut, you can navigate the online dating world with confidence and avoid falling victim to a scammer.
-
Will a scammer video call you?
- Since it would expose their true identity, a romance scammer will frequently decline to make a video call. Recall that con artists pose as different people in an attempt to entice you to fall in love. Scammers will use the anonymity that the Internet offers as a cover, so if you request a video call, they will come up with reasons why they are unable to do so.
-
Can a scammer fall in love with his victim?
- When someone is tricked by a scammer, people frequently experience heartbreak because they believed the love was genuine. This may prompt some to wonder if con artists are capable of true love. It’s critical to realize that if you’ve fallen for a romance scammer, this individual is not in love with you. Their sole objective is to take something from you, usually money. Any declarations of love or a shared future amount to manipulation.
-
How do you reveal a romance scammer?
- The easiest way to tell if someone is a romance scanner is to look for the following signs: they rush into a relationship and promise you a happy future together, but they never come over or communicate with you over the phone or through video chat. They will always have an explanation for why you can’t meet in person or communicate, but they will always ask you to send them money to help them through some kind of crisis.
In a nutshell:
Romance scams are an unfortunate reality in today’s world, but there are steps you can take to stay safe. A person is most likely a scammer if they ask for money, especially if they jump right into a relationship after meeting you on a dating app and then refuse to ever meet up.
It’s best to block this person right away so they can’t get in touch with you. Relationship counseling may be beneficial if you still have trouble establishing healthy relationships or if you are plagued by romance scammers. It will teach you how to be assertive and create meaningful romantic relationships.